Getting to Know Each Other
by SVOC Luva
Summary: AU Set during Hello Goodbye. Max and Alec do a bit more talking than what is in the actual episode.
1. Ben and Rachel

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any of the characters, but I sure wish I owned Alec!

Summary: AU Set during Hello Goodbye. Max and Alec do a bit more talking than what is in the actual episode.

Pairing: M/A

Chapter 1: Ben and Rachel

"So the thing that's got me worried is that I can't exactly use, well I was locked up in a secret government facility as my alibi.", Alec said being completely serious. From her bedroom Max called out, " I guess not."

"Yeah uh maybe Logan can pull one of his little... oh my god Logan is he alright?", Alec asked sounding worried while moving towards Max as she came out of her bedroom.

Max flipped her hair after pulling it out of her sweatshirt and said quietly," He's alright Joshua came through.

"Oh good, Logan could use a little canine plasma to loosen him up.", Alec said with a goofy grin plastered across his face.

Max frowned and walked over to the counter. Alec responded to her frown by raising his eyebrows and saying, "I'm just kidding Max. You know I love Logan... I mean not the way you love him... it just... well he's okay right. Max nodded sadly and started the process of making coffee. "So what's the problem?", Alec asked from the other side of the counter.

"I'm not going to see him anymore.", Max said sadly.

"Anymore this week?" he asked his face expressive. He watched her with twitching eyebrows and wide hazel eyes as he waited for her answer.

"Ever.", she answered with a slight shake of her head and looked up to see Alec slump his shoulders and look at her with exasperation clearly written across his face. "I can't risk it and I don't want to hear an I told you so.", Max said, her eyes pleading with him.

"I wasn't going to.", he said softly his eyes expressing compassion for her situation and that he wasn't so cruel as to tell her I told you so about something so serious.

"Coffee?", she asked him pointing at the kettle on the stove.

Alec scratched his head and uttered a soft, "Yeah sure." He began to fidget with his fingers as he tentatively said, " Hey listen since we're knee deep in painful subjects... tell me about him... about Ben.

She looked up at him and surprise, her eyes locking with his and she was surprised at what she saw there. In his eyes she saw a deep need to know who his brother was and what he was like. Alec wasn't trying to hurt her he just wanted to know Ben the way she did. Alec's big hazel eyes were pleading with her to tell him something, anything about Ben. Ben was more Alec's brother than he was hers, Alec deserved to know. "When we were kids back at Manticore he always wanted answers. You know why were there, what was outside. So he would make up these fantastic stories to explain things. Some how it made us feel loved... like we weren't all alone.", she said with a gentle voice and bright eyes.

Alec nodded and said," Sounds like a nice kid. What went wrong?" His eyes bore into hers expressing a need to know what happened to his brother, what could possibly happen to him.

"After we escaped it was like there was to many things in this world that he didn't have answers for. I don't know he just lost it.", Max said, her face expressing the deep confusion she felt inside. She turned away and grabbed some coffee mugs off of a shelf.

Alec swallowed tightly and stared at the back of Max's head before asking, with concern," Hey are you okay?"

Max answered with a firm," I'm fine.", and sat down on a stool.

Alec came around to her side of the counter and leaned on it. "Max what is it?", Alec said with a worried tone of voice.

She sounded disconnected as she said," We were in the woods, he was hurt. Manticore was closing in on us, he didn't want to go back there."

"Reindoctrination or worse.", Alec said his eyes expressing that he knew all to well the horror of reindoctrination and things that were much worse.

" I killed him.", she said suddenly. Alec's eyebrows furrowed and he looked at her confused. " He asked me to so I did.", she said sadly. They both swallowed tightly and even though she couldn't see him Max could feel the look of compassion and understanding he was sending in her direction. " Then I ran, I saved myself and I just.. left his body there for them to take away.", Max said brokenly, her voice raw with emotion.

Alec swallowed tightly and slowly leaned forward and kissed the top of her head. He shifted and rested his cheek against her silky hair and whispered," I'm sorry Max. I know how hard it is to be at fault for somebody's death, somebody that I loved."

Max wiped away the tears that were streaming down her face and whispered," Rachel Berrisford. I'm sorry Alec I know you loved her."

Alec nodded slightly and said, " Yeah I did, how'd you know?"

Max shot him a sad smile and said," That night at the Berrisford house I followed you to Rachel's room and I heard you tell her that you hadn't understood how much you loved her. Then you started to... you started crying and I knew you wouldn't want me to see that so I left. Alec tried to discreetly wipe the tears from his eyes that sprang up from the memory of that night but it was to late Max had already felt a few tear drops land on her head. She turned to look at him and was shocked by the complete look of anguish written across his face. " I'm sorry about Rachel Alec. What... what happened? Maybe it will help if you talk about it.

" Robert Berrisford had gained some information on Manticore. They wanted me to get close enough to figure out how much information he had and what he was going to do with it. They taught me to play the piano and I loved it, its the only good thing Manticore ever gave me.", Alec said smiling sadly.

" Anyway I was supposed to pretend to be Rachel's piano teacher and kill the real one. I did, I killed him and I hated it. He was an innocent he didn't deserve that. I hate the fact that I killed him Max, I really do.", he said his eyes pleading with her to understand he didn't want to kill anyone.

" I believe that you hated it Alec, I'm sorry I said that you could kill someone in cold blood. I didn't really believe that you murdered anyone when the cop told me you did but when I saw the evidence I thought the worst of you. Again, I'm sorry.", Max said softly and sincerely.

" It's okay Max... it just hurts when you think the worst of me.", Alec said honestly. "Anyway everyone believed I was Simon, that was the real piano teachers name." Alec said. After a moment of silence Alec spoke again. " I remember when I first met Rachel...", he trailed off lost in memory.

" She was so beautiful, so young and innocent. She was so vibrant and full of life, I'd never seen anyone so... so alive before.", he said smiling wistfully. "Anyway teaching her went smoothly at first. She was a fast learner. A few weeks after the first lesson she invited me to adinner party at her house. The night of the dinner party we shared our first kiss. I was supposed to get more intel on her father but she talked me into sneaking away with her. We went swimming.", Alec said sighing.

"Skinny dipping?", Max asked smirking.

"No.", Alec retorted. "We were wearing underwear. She wasn't ready to do anything like that and honestly neither was I. I was pretty much as innocent as her sexually at the time. That kiss Rachel and I shared was my first kiss Max, and I was so confused. I'd never felt the emotions I was feeling when I was kissing her.", Alec said looking so completely serious.

"Anyway it wasn't long after that Manticore ordered me to eliminate both of them. I tried to convince them to let Rachel live but they were adamant about me killing the both of them. I wired a bomb and placed it on the underside of the car. It was the morning and Mr. Berrisford was due to take Rachel to school. Manticore knew that and told me to blow up the car when they both got in. I couldn't do it, I couldn't kill her, I loved her.", Alec said brokenly.

" I ran into the house as she was coming down the stairs and I ran to her. I tried to convince her to leave with her father. I didn't want to tell her the truth about why I needed her to leave but she demanded to know. So I told her I was sent there to kill her father. I told her that it was my job... that she was my job. She slapped me and ran away from me as I was trying to tell her that I'd fallen in love with her and couldn't go through with it. I followed to try and stop her from going near the car but before I could get near her the car exploded. Manticore sent someone to check up on me and they detonated the bomb. I thought she was dead.", Alec whispered brokenly, tears streaming down his face.

As Max watched the droplets of despair stream down Alec's anguished face she felt her heart break for him. " Oh Alec I'm sorry... she... she was the first person who ever loved you and you didn't even get to tell her how much you loved her.", Max said in a sad voice. She stood up and hugged him tightly and after a moments hesitation he relaxed into the hug and let out a heart wrenching sob. She held him and he held her as they both cried over lost loved ones.

AN: I hope you guys liked it. If you did tell me and I'll write more if you didn't I won't write more. Please Review and constructive criticism please.


	2. Comfort

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any of the characters, but I sure wish I owned Alec!

Summary: AU Set during Hello Goodbye. Max and Alec do a bit more talking than what is in the actual episode.

Pairing: M/A

AN: I'm glad you liked the first chapter! Thank You for the reviews Dark Angel Fan Forever, Pand, lakergirl08, Nina430, and meritaten. This chapter contains mentions of rape but it's not graphic. Don't read if it's going to upset or bother you. Now on with the story.  


Chapter 2: Comfort

After crying for a while Alec and Max sat on the floor and held each other in comfortable silence. Max broke the silence by incredulously saying," I can't believe you were a virgin when you met Rachel."

Alec laughed at the suddenness of her comment and her incredulous tone of voice. Max smiled brightly at his laughter, it was a beautiful sound. And it was beautiful to her because it was genuine and not his usual cocky laugh. It made her happy that he was happy and relaxed enough around her to laugh like that. After a minute he turned serious and said, " I wasn't really a virgin, a Manticore guard had the privilege of taking my virginity. But it wasn't about love or passion or being horny or even having sex. It was about control, dominance, and humiliating me. It was to show me that I was nothing and that's how it made me feel, like I was nothing. It was completely degrading."

Max sat there completely shocked at the fact that he had been through _that _particular horror. " I'm sorry that you had to go through that Alec. What that guard did to you is just sick.", Max said compassionately.

" Yeah it was sick.", Alec agreed softly.

" Alec if you ever want to talk about it I'll be here for you. And don't worry about me you can be as detailed as you want.", Max said seriously.

" Can we... can we talk about it now?", he asked anxiously.

" Of course we can. We are already knee deep in painful subjects anyway right?", she said.

Alec smiled a little when she repeated his words from earlier and said," Ask me a question to get me started."

Max nodded and asked, " How old were you when it happened?"

"I was fifteen.", Alec said while fidgeting with his fingers.

" Oh my god you were so young!", she said shocked.

Alec just shrugged not knowing what to say. Because Alec didn't know what to say Max asked another question, " How did he over power you?"

" I trusted him when he said I needed to take a pill, he drugged me. It was scary, I could barely move. I tried... I tried to get away... I tried so hard but I just couldn't get away.", he said anguished.

" It hurt so bad. He never kissed me on the lips but he kissed me all over the rest of my body. His kisses were wet and sloppy, his teeth broke my skin with sharp nips and bites, his nails dug into my back until I bled, his hands squeezed until I was bruised, and he thrust into me until I was ripped apart. And that wasn't the worst part, the worst part was that I had an erection... I didn't have any control over my body. He laughed at me and called me a whore and said that I enjoyed it. Then he gave me a blow job and left me alone. I cried all night long, it was the worst experience in my life.", he said brokenly.

Alec took a deep shuddering breath before breaking down into sobs. Max pulled him tightly to her stroking his hair and peppering his face with soft kisses. Then she whispered reassuring words in his ear, " It wasn't your fault Alec. You didn't deserve that. You're not a whore, your reaction was normal. Nobody's going to hurt you like that ever again, I won't let them."

She rocked him until his crying quieted but still held him tightly to her. He buried his face in the crook of her neck and whispered, " Thank you Maxie".

" There is no need to thank me Alec.", Max said while playing with the hair at the nape of Alec's neck.

" Yes there is Maxie, I really needed to talk about it, so thank you.", Alec said sincerely.

"Alec lets try and get some sleep, we've both had a long day.", Max said, pulling away from him.

" Maxie can we... can we just...", he said trailing off.

" Can we just what?", Max asked smiling.

" Can we just stay like this for a while... nobody has ever done... um...", Alec said flustered.

" Nobody has ever done what?", Max asked.

" Never mind.", Alec said still flustered.

" Alec tell me.", Max said firmly.

" It's just that nobody has ever done this for me before.", Alec said ducking his head so she couldn't see his face.

" You mean nobody has ever comforted you before. You've never had some one stroke your hair, or rock you, or wipe away your tears.", she said and lifted his chin so that he was looking her in the eye.

" Yeah.", he answered, staring at her with those big expressive eyes. His eyes were expressing gratitude and need.

" And you want more comfort Alec and that's okay.", Max said.

" So we can stay here for a little while?", he asked timidly.

" I was thinking more along the lines of you and I just holding each other while trying to get some sleep in my bed.", Max said.

" Okay.", Alec said getting up and then pulling Max up as well.

They held hands as they walked into Max's room and got ready for bed.

AN: I hope you liked it. Please Review and constructive criticism please. I'llwrite more if you want more and I won't if you don't.


	3. Self Preservation

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any of the characters, but I sure wish I owned Alec!

Summary: AU Set during Hello Goodbye. Max and Alec do a bit more talking than what is in the actual episode.

Pairing: M/A

AN: I'm glad you guys liked my last chapter! Thanks for the reviews dustori, Pand, Haribo Joe, Loisen, lakergirl08, HYPERLITE.HO, SerafinLatina, and Dark Angel Fan Forever! I really appreciate all the reviews and I really hope you enjoy chapter three!

Chapter 3: Self Preservation

It was the next morning and Alec woke to the feeling of Max's arms rapped tightly around him. He instinctively snuggled closer to her warm body and buried his face in the crook of her neck. He sighed heavily and whispered, " Good morning Maxie. "

Max opened her eyes and smiled. " Good morning to you too Alec. ", Max said softly while lifting a hand to the nape of his neck to run her fingers through the soft hair there.

After a minute Alec slowly pulled away and sat up. Max sat up as well and spoke, worried, " How're you doing Alec? "

Alec opened his mouth to speak but Max cut him off. " And I don't want to hear any of that I'm always alright bullshit you're always spouting. ", she stated sternly.

" I... uh... I... ", Alec stuttered, not knowing what to say.

" Seriously Alec how're you doing? ", Max asked.

" I'm doing better than I was last night, that's for sure.", Alec answered honestly.

" Look Max, thanks for just being there last night, nobody's ever comforted me before. I'm sorry I unloaded on you, I usually have more control on my emotions than that.", Alec said.

" Don't be sorry for having emotions Alec, contrary to what Manticore taught us to believe it's okay to feel. It's okay to cry, sometimes that's the best way to get the pain out.", Max said seriously.

" I guess I know that, but it's hard to believe that I can show my emotions without being punished for it. Like you said, Manticore didn't encourage us to have emotions. They wanted us to be unfeeling soldiers with only thoughts of following orders and completing the mission. I've always had feelings Max, I've just never been allowed to show them and now that I can I'm not really sure how. So I pretend to be happy and hide behind my smart aleck ways and I'm always alright attitude. It's self preservation Maxie, if people think of me as the happy go lucky guy I'm less likely to get close to people which means I'm less likely to get hurt. And the hurt that I already feel well that gets locked away in the back of my mind so I won't hurt anymore.", Alec said brokenly.

He chuckled cynically and said, " It nearly works. "

" I get what you're saying Alec, I used to be the same way. But I realized it doesn't really work you still get hurt, you just aren't letting anybody know it. Why suffer alone? Let somebody be there for you and maybe you won't have to pretend to be happy anymore, maybe you really will be. ", Max said insightfully.

" I guess your right even though I pretend I don't hurt I still do. But I've always pretended and I don't know how to stop now. ", Alec said.

Alec got up, slipped into his jacket and put his boots on. " I should get going I need to find a place to hide out and you need to get to work.", Alec said seriously.

" You're right. I'll walk you out and then come back up and get ready for work.", Max said with a sigh.

They both got off the bed and headed out. When they got outside Max turned to Alec and said, " You better lay low until we get this whole mistaken identity thing sorted out."

" Yeah maybe I'll crash at Joshua's do you think he'll mind? ", Alec asked smirking.

" Are you kidding? He'll love it. ", Max stated.

Alec shot Max a small smile and said, " Well thanks for saving my butt, again. It must be hard huh, having me around? Some guy with Ben's face making you think about things you'd rather forget. "

" Yeah.", she said shrugging her shoulders, " That's probably why I'm such a bitch to you sometimes. "

" Maybe, or you know maybe it's because I'm such a pain in the ass sometimes. ", he said smirking and rapping his arm around her shoulder.

Max smiled and playfully pushed him away, " Be careful. "

Alec shot her a small smile and touched her arm with the sleeve of his jacket. " Always.", he said as he walked away feeling happier than he had in... well ever.

AN: I hope you guys liked it! I'm planning on writing more but I won't write more if nobody's going to read it. So please tell me if you want me to continue. Please review, it's very much appreciated.

Thanks,

Alaina


	4. Clearing The Air

Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any of the characters, but I sure wish I owned Alec!

Summary: AU Set during Hello Goodbye. Max and Alec do a bit more talking than what is in the actual episode.

Pairing: M/A

AN: I'm so sorry. I haven't updated in ages. I sure hope this chapter is good enough to make up for it. Thanks for the reviews meow114, Valkyrie Nienna Helyanwe, OoljeeAingeal, Regretful, hermione169242, timetowaste247, lakergirl08, Pand, dustori, SerafinLatina, Dark Angel Fan Forever, meritaten, Amiwilson, HYPERLITE.HO, and Haribo Joe, they're greatly appreciated.

Chapter 4: Clearing The Air

Alec sighed heavily as he made his way up the run down stairs of Seattle's once most popular tourist attraction. When he reached the top he looked around at the remains of what use to be a restaurant and observation deck. Alec made his way out of the broken window and onto the hard metal shell of the Space Needle.

Alec saw Max's form sitting at the edge, just where he'd thought she'd be, and made his way over to her. "Hey Max, I thought I'd find you here.", he spoke softly.

"I come here to be alone.", she said, some what coldly.

Alec nodded and smiled wryly. "Yeah I know, but considering everything that went down today I figured we could both use a friend right now.", he said, sincerely, voice gentle.

Max motioned with her head to the spot next to her and said, her voice much warmer than before, "Sit down."

Alec slowly and gracefully lowered himself to sit next to her. He ran a hand through his dark blonde locks and sighed, letting out a deep breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Alec rubbed his hands together tiredly before turning to Max and asking, "So you got any deep thoughts you wanna share? Any… uh profound realizations about life?"

"Yeah, love sucks.", Max stated adamantly.

"That it does.", Alec agreed firmly.

Max turned to him, looking him in the eye and asked mournfully, " Do you think it'll ever be better, ever not suck?"

"Honestly, I don't know Maxie but I sure hope so.", Alec answered truthfully.

Max sighed heavily, "Yeah, I hope so too."

"Let me guess, you broke it off with Logan?", Alec asked, sympathetically."

"Yeah… um Alec Logan saw you leaving my place this morning and he came to the conclusion that you and I are together.", Max said, looking everywhere but at Alec.

"So what did you tell him?", Alec asked, calmly.

"Alec I'm sorry, but I let him think it was true. I needed a something to push him away and he gave it to me.", Max said, shamefaced.

"And I had to be the bad guy again? I'm so tired of being the bad guy in your life.", Alec said, pained. He sighed heavily and mentally kicked himself in the head for his stupidity. He should've known better than to get his hopes up that Max would see him as a friend someone she cared about now and not as a screw up who is the bane of her existence

"I'm sorry Alec. I know that I haven't been fair to you. I'm sorry that I've used you as my personal punching bag and that I've never tried to get to know you. I'm sorry that I've hurt you. Sorry that I'm always yelling at you and blaming for things that aren't you're fault. I'm sorry that I haven't been helping you adjust to life outside of Manticore, sorry that I've been making it harder. I'm sorry if you feel like I don't care. I'm so sorry Alec." Max said, genuinely sorry, tears of regret streaming down her beautiful face.

Alec looked at her in shock, her outburst had really surprised him. Maybe he was wrong maybe Max did care. Not as much as he cared about her but, even if she only just cared about him as a friend that would be enough. He watched as her tears streamed down her face his heart aching at the sight. Alec's eyes stung, bright with unshed tears as he reached out and pulled her close. He shakily reached up and tenderly wiped away her tears with the pads of his thumbs before planting a soft kiss on her forehead.

Alec pulled back and his vibrant hazel-green eyes met Max's rich chocolate-brown ones. "Thank you. I'm sorry too. I'm sorry for trying to kill you, sorry that you lost the cure for the virus. I'm sorry that I'm a constant reminder of Ben and how much you miss him. I'm sorry for accidentally giving your virus papers to Josh so he could use them on his paintings. I'm just sorry.", he said, his voice holding nothing but sincerity.

Max shot Alec a smile and said brightly, "Now that we've cleared the air how about we celebrate our new friendship."

"Sounds good to me, what do you have in mind?", he asked, smiling genuinely.

AN: There is chapter four. I really hope you enjoyed it. I'll update sooner this time. Please Review.


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